My friend Brittney had her birthday party on Sunday night. It was not the typical birthday event, as she invited all of her closest lady friends to come and hear a woman speak who has inspired her greatly in her own life. The speaker was Paige Henderson of Fellowship of the Sword ( She shared an amazing message that would inspire and empower all women. Paige Henderson was such a thoughtful and intelligent speaker. She went to Genesis and the original Hebrew meanings of some of the initial verses pertaining to the creation of Adam and Eve. I appreciated her intelligent translations and insight to this book of the bible, as it gives us a view of how and why God created women.

Here is my grasp of the night’s teachings. God created man and woman as equal, but different. We are to use our differences as God intended us to. This means, that our emotional insight and higher emotional functioning, compared to man, should be used for good. Not evil, not ever. Unfortunately, we, as women, tend to use our emotions as a weapon. Oh, of course, I admit that I too have done this more times in life than I care to admit. Even with a PhD in psychology and knowing how words can damage others so easily, I have unleashed words I would pay money to take back.

A great point made by Mrs. Henderson that I took note of…that was not necessarily a primary message she was putting forth that night, but was however a message that spoke to my heart was the following: In emotional conversations do not speak unless your comments/statements will:

  1. Build Up
  2. Shield/Protect
  3. Unify

What an excellent guideline to live by. Not an easy one either. My husband Justin has a great deal of wisdom, much of which I attribute to his daily conversations he had with his Mother while she was alive. One thing he has said since I met him was “before saying anything consider: what is the upside of that statement”. Very good stance to abide by as well. Think before speaking, but beyond that, think “what is the benefit or my commentary”. Will it help my stance, or is it merely being said to tear down another person in hopes that I can “win”? If it is the later, then I need to rethink my words or simply remain silent.

As a woman, mother, wife, and doctor I realize that there is power behind my words. Power to build up or power to tear down. With whoever I come in contact with on any given day, my goal is to build that person up in the good qualities and attributes that God has given them. Because to even the most sinful and depraved people on earth, God has given them positive attributes that can be encouraged and used for the good and positive glory of God, which can in turn 0nly be positive for all mankind.

“Our words have the power to destroy and the power to build up (Proverbs 12:6). The writer of Proverb tells us, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (Proverbs 18:21). Are we using words to build up people or destroy them? Are they filled with hate or love, bitterness or blessing, complaining or compliments, lust or love, victory or defeat? Like tools they can be used to help us reach our goals or to send us spiraling into a deep depression.”

are powerful
forces of nature.

they are destruction.
they are nourishment.
they are flesh.
they are water.
they are flowers
and bone.

they burn. they cleanse
they erase. they etch.

they can either
leave you

or brimming
with home.”
Sanober Khan

The message on Sunday night at Brittney’s house was a good reminder to me to watch what I say. Especially to my children. I have the ability to lift them up or tear them down. AS ALL mothers have this incomprehensible power. We should use it daily to create children who become people in this world who love the Lord and will make their life an effort of doing what is good, right, and uplifting.

Thank you Brittney for sharing your birthday with me and the other women. I appreciate the message and the messenger very much! God Bless!